Sunday, July 10, 2005

Voices in My Head

God. Lindsay Lohan really looks like shit in her new video doesn't she? Also, her publicist should really convince her not to try and dance. She looks like CC from Poison.
***

Shit that went through my head while I was at the gas station yesterday that I am too lazy to write up in a funny or humorous way:

1. I really need to get my teeth fixed. The front one is all chipped and jacked up. I could wait until after Halloween though--I could be a witch, with my black clothes and fucked up teeth I would just need the hat. If Halloween is the week before my period I won't even need makeup.

2. Witches really do have the best accessories though. I mean the hat alone.

3. Gas is so fucking expensive, when I got my license it was like a dollar a gallon. Which made doing the math so easy. And seven bucks could get me through most of the week. Gas is $2.40 now, that makes the math SO HARD.

4. God I sound like my dad talking about when he learned to drive gas was a dime a nickel a gallon and milk was a dime a gallon and how crazy the world is now that if you could invent a car that ran on milk instead of gas it would totally be fucking cheaper.

5. I could just poke myself in the eyes for making myself like my dad in yet another way. I have his big giant head and tiny tiny hands. ISN'T THAT ENOUGH?

6. Why does J only drink two swallows of water out of a bottle and then leave the damn things in my car? Is he trying to prepare for us to be trapped in that car in some sort of apolcolyptical incident?

7. I really need a pedicure.

8. Fucking tanning booth has given me HIGHLIGHTS IN MY EYEBROWS.

9. If I win the lottery I think I would take a long vacation. After running around on the street screaming like a maniac.

10. And get my mom a Tivo. She really needs a Tivo so she can watch Perry Mason.

Maybe my anti-depressants are working a little too well?

No comments: