Don't Send Me To Canada

I hesitate to admit this, but I really hate the Fourth of July.

Don't get me wrong, I love having a holiday from work, enjoy a good barbecue, adore the white sale at Target and can eat an entire watermelon all on my own. But I loathe, just loathe fireworks.

Since we live in a rural area, the popping started earlier this week. Firecrackers are illegal, of course, but since we live in an unincorporated part of the county, a sheriff would have to come out to enforce it--which is just not going to happen. We also live about ten feet off of an Indian reservation. You know they are selling crazy shit up there when the first question they ask you at any of those stands is, "You FBI?"

I don't enjoy fireworks at all. I mean, yes, some of the displays are pretty, but overall I find even the most elaborate shows pretty boring. And the noise and smoke and crowds just make the whole thing too much effort altogether. Darla and I are up in bed becoming more and more irritated with every fucking BOOM.

When I was younger my family would sometimes go to this giant family reunion over the Fourth of July. It is the kind of weekend that is incredibly fun when you are young and extremely boring as you get older. There were an alarming number of relatives--since my mother's family seems to have thousands of children each. It was held at a ranch so you never really felt like you got clean. But there was great food, lots of games and then a huge fireworks show.

The first couple of years it was nice enough Mostly professionally done, with a few people shooting off their own. But after a few years the ranch filled up with local people, so that everyone was elbow to elbow and people shot things off willy-nilly. Practically at each other.

I HATED THAT.

Seriously. Was brought up to fear firecrackers which is why I am twenty-six and have all my fingers. And I just hated how scary that fireworks show got. And I really haven't enjoyed the Fourth since.

So I think I will spend tomorrow watching baseball, shopping for towels and then with big earphones to block the noise out.