I am not sure what was wrong with me today. I just feel so frustrated and angry. Nothing horrible happened to me. Nothing even bad happened to me today. I just feel on edge and I can't figure out why.
I am struggling right now. I don't love my career. It doesn't honestly even feel like a career. So I don't love my job. I think that I am still trying to deal with Gladys being gone. Her death has really made me focus on what I want my life to be like. I want to be happy. I want to enjoy my family. Take pleasure in each day.
But I don't right now.
I honestly feel guilty about that. How dare I feel unhappy or frustrated? Gladys can't feel those things. I would imagine that she would do anything to hug her child one more time. I have an opportunity to really treasure what I am doing with my life and I am wasting it.
At the same time if one more person says, "You just have to live every day like it is your last," I am going to beat the shit out of them.