Had myself a little meltdown in the car on the way home today (y'all J deserves a medal). The gal that is supposed to train me for my new job has long since moved onto her new position (she left four weeks before I started--I do not blame her at all). And no one seems to be able to help me at all. They ask me to do things but I do know how, not only do they not know how to do these things but they have no idea how I can figure it out. Normally, I would just make up my own way and just fumble through it, but my new boss is very particular so I am at a loss.
Not only that but I am just so lonely. My new co-workers are all very nice people but I sit by myself, separated from all of them and they sit together. I could not show up for days and no one would probably even notice. They would think that they were just missing me while I was in the bathroom or something. My old group was like family and yes that was difficult too but I could always ask people for help. I have no one to help me down there and I am not handling that well.
To top it off, I just feel stupid. Like maybe I was wrong to come down here. Clearly, it is not working. And I have a lot of paranoia about being fired. Which is so hard for me, I want to do a good job, it is so important to me. And yet I cannot for the life of me figure out how to do that.
So I cried, no doubt in part due to the crazy hormones that have taken my brain hostage (damn you erratic menstrual cycles! stop fucking with me, my skin and my mental health!).
In the mailbox when I got home was a fine assessment from our HOA for our dog shitting in some one's yard.
Pity the fucker that got my email. I am not paying that shit. They are going to have to provide dated digital photos to get me to pay that.
NOTE TO MY NEIGHBORS: IF MY DOG SHITS IN YOUR YARD I AM DEEPLY SORRY, PLEASE COME TO MY HOUSE AND GET ME, I WILL GLADLY CLEAN THAT UP BECAUSE IT IS GROSS AND AGAIN I AM SO SORRY. DO NOT CALL THE HOA AND COMPLAIN BECAUSE THAT IS AN ASSFUCK MOVE THAT MAKES ME WANT TO BURN DOWN YOUR HOUSE.
From weeping to raging in less than thirty seconds.