It Is A Little Like Heathers

I couldn't help but listen to something that was going on over the wall in my office today.

There is a woman in my group, she is a little older (even then everyone else, who are all older than me, I think she has kids closer to my age than she is), her husband also works in our group. She is respected and liked but just different. So far I can tell these people are pretty cliquey and she just doesn't fit in.

It was some one's birthday today and several people were going out to lunch. They invited her but left while she was in the bathroom. In their defense, I don't think they planned it that way, they had just said we are having lunch at this time at this place you should come. Her husband came over, and in that dopey husbandy way, dragged her to the lunch. He is a sweet man, not unlike my husband in that he is a dork and has no problem making an ass of himself. Good thing too. Because he does.

Anyway they walked over there. And then came back like within ten minutes. And I could tell by the tone of her voice that she was upset. I guess they were all sitting at a table for four. She didn't even go in. She was convinced that they didn't really want her to come, that they invited her to be polite.

Her husband, so sweet, but so clueless just didn't understand. But dear GOD, I have been there. It takes you back to being in fourth grade and not sitting at the popular table. No matter how popular you were later, how many friends you have now, that shit sucks you up. Especially women. Because women do bullshit things like invite people to lunch and not want them to come. They do it all the fucking time really. Men cannot relate to that at all.

That kind of stuff has caused more arguments in my house than I can say.

"Did they really want us to come? Or was it sort of like 'oh come over whenever?'"

" . . . ?"

"Well?"

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

I wanted to go over and talk to her. Tell her that I really don't think that they meant it that way. That it was just a Friday afternoon and they were happy to go to lunch. That they really had meant her to come. I mean, it is not like the invited me. But I couldn't do that. I didn't want to embarrass her and besides that would be breaking the cardinal rule of cubicle dwelling.

Pretend you didn't hear that.