I have not been sleeping well.
Last night I had an intense and rather confusing dream that I was commuting to work on the train when a man jumped up and shot me in the rib (yes, specifically the rib). It wasn't bleeding or painful and I could just look down and see the bullet lodged in the bone. I went to the hospital and was talking to the nurse, for whatever reason I didn't want to be admitted and so she decided she could removed it herself using pliers. Which the bullet came loose it started bleeding and it hurt so badly I couldn't move. And I woke up with the spot on my rib killing me.
When I tell J this dream he tells me that my subconscious is asking me to make room in my heart for Jesus, the way the God made me from Adam's rib.
I had a second dream where I mysteriously had twin two year old boys (terrifying enough) who had locked themselves in the bathroom. They couldn't unlock the door and I couldn't get the drill to work properly so I could get the door off the hinges. And they were crying and I was crying and I woke up just so freaked out by the whole thing.
It was actually way more upsetting than the first dream.
Possibly because I had twin two year old boys, being shot would be much easier.
J told me that my subconscious was upset because I had locked Jesus out of my heart and my inner child was just crying and begging to be let out.
I hate fucking J.
I suppose this means I am going to have to stop telling him he is superior to me in every way in order to get some goddamn sympathy.
Maybe tonight I will dream about booze and cigarettes. I totally deserve them after last night.
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