Today was a great day. We woke up early, sort of groggy because of a late-running dinner with friends and Jenga-fest last night, and went to my parents' house for Father's Day. J and my dad smashed the shit out of their old entertainment unit--something I think my father has been dreaming of pretty much since he moved the fucking thing the first time. They put together the new stand and the very fancy and STUNNING plasma TV my parents just bought. We ate steaks and potatoes. We enjoyed each other and then J and I had to skate out earlier because our softball league started tournament play today.
Our dogs were in the dugout and being delightfully (and alarmingly) well-behaved. Our team was playing well, even hitting. The team we were playing had been undefeated all season but we were still in the game. And then it happened.
One of our best hitters hit a line drive way back, past the outfielders and onto the running trail behind the park. An asshole who was running by actually PICKED UP THE BALL and threw it in. UH HEY ASSHOLE WE ARE PLAYING A GAME. He had actually scored by then but the ump made him go back to third because of interference. Again THANKS ASS I KNOW THEIR CENTERFIELDER IS REAL PRETTY BUT GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE.
He scored anyway so it didn't change the game. Except it did. Because when he got into the dug out and said, "I can't believe that guy Jewed me out of a homerun."
And that changed the game for me.
We kept playing, and couldn't really say much. But it really wasn't a fun day at the park anymore. I just wanted to go home.
I think we made a mistake. We chose not to say anything, we didn't want to ruin everyone's afternoon (obviously I do not give a shit about this guy's afternoon but the rest of the team didn't do anything). We should have jumped up and shouted. We should have done something.
It is hard to understand why we didn't.
Or maybe it isn't.
Because J put it pretty plainly in the car. Neither of us think the guy is anti-Semitic. It is pretty plausible that he didn't really think about the phrase (which honestly is worse because FUCK y'all, would you just drop any other racial slur?) but what if he is? What if one of us said something and he said that it is a free country and he can say what he wants (I know that is totally a fifth grade response but that is about his grade level).
Well if he did that we would have to leave. I couldn't have played. The team would have had to forfeit.
Instead we just said something to the manager at the end of the game. About how he should talk to the guy before the summer season starts or he is going to run into some problems with us. The manager half-heartedly apologized. I think he thought we were being too sensitive. Apparently Jews are just supposed to take that shit, just the way women are supposed to deal with sexist jokes and crude remarks.
But I feel differently about the day now.
I feel differently about the team and about the manager and about everything. And I feel differently about myself. I imagine myself as the kind of person that stands up for herself. And now I know differently.
1 comment:
Wow. First of all, great day for the most part. Love the softball game and fun part. Love your dad and J. takin' it to the old entertainment center. Must've felt so good!
You really got my attn. with the "Jewed me out" comment.
I am a reporter and have been for 20 years. About 15 years ago I was interviewing a high school football player on the telephone about a game he had played the previous week that I had watched and reported on.
I asked him about a certain catch he made and he was quite proud of it and whatnot and then he said something to the tune of, "Well, i had to make the catch because earlier in the game, the ref Jewed me out of another one..."
I. Like. Totally. Paused. I. Was. Completely. Pissed. But. I. Had. To. Be. Professional. But. I. Wanted. Oh. How. I. Wanted. To. Just. Rip. The. Kid. A. New. One.
So, i calmed myself down and i interrupted him because he was still rambling on about whatever and i was still stuck in THAT statement he'd made.
I said, "(Kid's name), um, I think I need to tell you that I'm Jewish and I *really* don't appreciate you saying what you said about the referee."
I then went on to explain why it was so totally shitty of him to use that expression. He honestly had no idea that it was anti-Semitic, just that "everyone" else uses it...
I believed him because that's the small-town mentality in suburban San Diego, California. However, i cautioned him about using such phrases because of their prejudicial slant.
Anyway, your post reminded me of that and it just shows the ignorance. Thanks for allowing me to rant..
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