Sunday, August 31, 2008

Social Cleaning

When J and I got married we were the only ones we knew in our circle of friends who were married. In fact, most of our friends didn't have long term relationships at all. And we spent a lot of time trying (largely unsuccessfully) to cultivate that holiest of grails. The couple friends.

It's a quirky bit of chemistry to find friends that the husband/boyfriend gets along with the other husband/boyfriend, and likewise for the ladies (I guess this is probably also true for same sex relationships) but also the four people enjoying everyone's company. Add in that my husband is the sort of person you really LOVE or just loathe and I am socially awkward and . . it has been a challenge.

We've tried though. Lord knows we try. We have one set that the girlfriend and I have literally not one thing in common and yet we soldier on, eight years into the relationship. It is just close enough. Even though after eight years I still don't know much about her and would never dream of going to movie or anything with her on my own. We can get through a night of cards and a few barbecues with each other.

Adding a baby into the mix makes this even harder because now it would be really great to have this other couple have kids and hey could one of them be a baby?

This is why, after MoMo was returned to us by the grandparents today, and after she went to bed we steam cleaned the fucking floors of this house. I am baking cookies. And making wings. And a variety of other things. Because one of J's friends and his wife are coming with their kids tomorrow and well. Maybe they are the ONES.

Normally J will claim I will just love whatever girlfriend/wife that he can dig up. Because all chicks enjoy each other. We just sit around and look at each other's vaginae and whooping it up. J has never been a thirteen year old girl, he thinks all women like each other.

I do like women though. It's just harder for me to find ones that I want to spend a lot of time with--female friendships are amazing but they require a lot of upkeep. You have to invest in female friends in a way that you don't with men. But this woman does sound nice and her youngest is about a year old--older than Mo but still a young baby. For this I will clean my house and try to not be a social moron. Try.

So wish me luck. I might be drinking all morning (while baking!) in preparation for trying to charm these people. All so J and I can have a couple to play poker with and eat cheesy appetizers with. I am a team player.

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