After ten years together I finally figured out something important about J last year.
Dude doesn't know how to eat.
I don't mean that he can't use a knife and fork, I mean that well his grasp of nutrition was more tenuous than I could have imagined.
I didn't realize that the fucked up girl-culture of dieting teachings women about fat vs. calories, protein, vitamins, etc. I found out that until I told him he actually thought that a piece of white bread with butter on it was a healthy snack.
This explains a lot about his food issues and also about his confusion about why I kept trying to get him to eat something beside canned spaghetti.
My mother dieted for my entire childhood. While I don't want to repeat that experience for my daughter I think it was a gift to learn to eat multiple vegetables at every meal, to eat lots of chicken and pork, to like fish and not eat so much starch. Not a perfect foundation but much better than what J had.
I do not want to create environment of "good" and "bad" foods though. My mother always seemed to believe that thin people could have good and bad foods but if you were fat you had no right to eat anything not scrupulously healthy--also she had "no right" to be hungry. It is just depressing to think about that.
So I consider myself a moderately healthy eater. I do get 5-6 servings of fruit and vegetables each day. I eat a variety of foods. I try to eat more plants, less meat and plenty of fish. I drink milk. I drink water. And I give myself a break. Notice that I don't say that I eat low fat, or low call or low carb. Everything in moderation.
But then again, I am not thin either.
I have low cholesterol, low blood pressure and my doctor said I am a very healthy person (with good bone density). My goal is to be healthy but also enjoy my foods. That is what I want to model for my daughter. I try to use my junky foods for things that I really enjoy since I don't want to eat too many of them.
That being said, there are some things that I know are not healthy and also completely terrible that I just adore. Note: I am not sure these things are really food.
1. Stouffer's lasagna (just the original meat version--not the Italian or chicken or cream whatever)
2. McDonald's Filet O'Fish
3. Queso dip made from Velveeta
4. Hamburger Helper--Cheeseburger Macaroni
5. Pizza Rolls
Does anyone else do this?